Twitter account parodying Fifty Shades of Grey is the greatest thing that ever was, ever will be
It is believed that great literature inspires and spawns many, many more.
It is however, a widely-known but little-acknowledged fact that terrible 'literature' gives birth to just as many deluded souls.
EL James, the author of the trilogy for nymphomaniacs - Fifty Shades of Grey - has made no secret of the fact that her books were inspired by Stephenie Meyers' Twilight series.
For the uninitiated, the Twilight series chronicled the lives of a 17-year-old girl and an approximately 100-year-old vampire who fall in love and bring a half-vampire-half-human child into this world. There's more, the child turns out to be the 'soulmate' of a werewolf who was previously in love with the human mommy, Bella.
That such a plotline lead to the birth of the most twisted and disturbingly-violent storyline for nymphomaniacs and about nymphomaniacs is hardly surprising.
But what is still more surprising is that for once, the theory that terrible lit begets terrible lit, has been completely shattered.
The memes, cartoons, spoofs and write-ups that have followed have been shockingly refreshing. The primary of these is 50 Nerds of Grey, the Twitter handle that is hellbent on turning the narrative from something crass and degrading into something definitely worth reading and not at all vomit-inducing.
'I've been a very bad girl,' she said, biting her lip. 'I need to be punished.'
— 50 Nerds of Grey (@50NerdsofGrey) September 7, 2015
'Very well,' he said and installed Windows 10 on her laptop.
When she found out he worked in technical support, it really turned her on.
— 50 Nerds of Grey (@50NerdsofGrey) May 3, 2016
Then it turned her off.
Then it turned her on again.
"Don't hold back," she begged, "I like it rough!"
— 50 Nerds of Grey (@50NerdsofGrey) May 1, 2016
"OK," he said. "I roll a nine so you're trapped in the dungeon with a six-headed troll."
'Do you want a happy ending?' she asked, massaging his back.
— 50 Nerds of Grey (@50NerdsofGrey) April 24, 2016
'Yes please' he replied.
'OK' she said 'Jon Snow's still alive.'#GameofThrones
'Ouch!' he cried in pain as her hand swiped right across his face.
— 50 Nerds of Grey (@50NerdsofGrey) April 23, 2016
'I'm sorry,' she said. 'I thought we were still on Tinder.'
'Make me feel used, dirty and ashamed! she begged.
— 50 Nerds of Grey (@50NerdsofGrey) April 22, 2016
'Ok,' he said and took her to the Apple Store.
'How do you feel about chains?' she whispered, stroking his chest.
— 50 Nerds of Grey (@50NerdsofGrey) April 17, 2016
He gulped. 'I quite like Pizza Hut but I'm not so keen on McDonalds.'
'I love listening to a man who can make me feel desperate and humiliated,' she said, squirming.
— 50 Nerds of Grey (@50NerdsofGrey) April 16, 2016
'All right,' he said, and called IT support.
"I can't take any more!" she cried, exhausted after three hours bent over the desk.
— 50 Nerds of Grey (@50NerdsofGrey) April 30, 2016
It was no good, she just couldn't remember her password.
They tried it standing up, sitting down and bent over the kitchen table but it was no good - they just couldn't get a decent wi-fi signal.
— 50 Nerds of Grey (@50NerdsofGrey) April 8, 2016
He was heavily into BDSM - Batman, Daredevil, Superman and Mr Fantastic.
— 50 Nerds of Grey (@50NerdsofGrey) March 31, 2016
'Harder!' she screamed, 'Harder!'
— 50 Nerds of Grey (@50NerdsofGrey) March 24, 2016
'All right,' he said. 'What's the square root of nine times twelve divided by six point three recurring?'
'Punish me!' she cried desperately, 'Make me suffer like only a real man can!'
— 50 Nerds of Grey (@50NerdsofGrey) March 18, 2016
'Very well,' he replied, and left the toilet seat up . . .
--
Edited by Blassy Boben
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