Nine Lives movie review: Kevin Spacey starrer isn't even catnip for cat lovers
This summer of bad movies just got worse with Nine Lives. After the teaser trailer showed up a few months ago, I wasn't even sure if this movie was real.
Everything in this unoriginal, cliched movie is so exaggerated that it's hard to sit through its 87-minute runtime. In short, with a 9% rating on Rotten Tomatoes, Nine Lives goes straight into the litter box.
What's worse is the fact that this comes from director Barry Sonnenfeld, the man who brought us great movies like Men in Black and The Addams Family - both great films in their own right.
The movie is essentially about a crazy cat man who turns people he deems "bad" into cats to teach them a moral lesson of some sort. And if they don't learn their lesson in time, well, their human bodies die and they're stuck as cats forever. Dark.
You probably already know that Kevin Spacey plays the cat. Or is it that the cat plays Kevin Spacey? Hmm.
The film also stars Jennifer Garner and Christopher Walken ( the crazy cat man mentioned above).
But why Kevin... Why? This is beneath you. It's one thing for a big name actor to help out an indie film get traction by having a big name attached. But this garbage? Et tu, Christopher Walken? We barely get to see you do your eccentric thing anymore, so it's sad to see you doing trash like this.
Note: Walken doesn't use just any old cats for his meddling, but only the best of the best of internet cats. Pudge, Lil BUB, Waffles and Hamilton the Hipster Cat all appear in this film. Looks like Grumpy Cat was too busy. Diva.
The verdict
The kids will be bored with this one, so you know it's an utter waste of time. And Kevin Spacey.